From bca15936f49dd0777d83d57d520d608c87643b7a Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001
From: Ren Kararou <ren@kararou.space>
Date: Sat, 13 Apr 2024 11:45:19 -0500
Subject: [PATCH] status save

---
 .gitignore                            |   2 +
 src/chapters/.04-a-newfeeling.tex.swp | Bin 16384 -> 0 bytes
 src/chapters/05-a-downtime.tex        | 122 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++
 src/promise.tex                       |   4 +
 4 files changed, 128 insertions(+)
 delete mode 100644 src/chapters/.04-a-newfeeling.tex.swp

diff --git a/.gitignore b/.gitignore
index 567609b..00ee70b 100644
--- a/.gitignore
+++ b/.gitignore
@@ -1 +1,3 @@
 build/
+*.swp
+*.bak
diff --git a/src/chapters/.04-a-newfeeling.tex.swp b/src/chapters/.04-a-newfeeling.tex.swp
deleted file mode 100644
index 6947f98911f1d37fb2a966455736db7cc43e1fd1..0000000000000000000000000000000000000000
GIT binary patch
literal 0
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diff --git a/src/chapters/05-a-downtime.tex b/src/chapters/05-a-downtime.tex
index e69de29..08a7fbb 100644
--- a/src/chapters/05-a-downtime.tex
+++ b/src/chapters/05-a-downtime.tex
@@ -0,0 +1,122 @@
+``You're right!'' Ai screamed.  She followed with much less energy.  ``You're right.  We've been unfair to you.  I'm sorry.''
+
+``No yo-'' I spluttered.  What did she just say?  My rage evaporated as realization settled in my bones.  ``Thank you.''
+
+``I owe you a lot more than an apology, of course,'' she said, fidgeting with her hands.  ``But it will have to do for the moment.''
+
+I simply stared in shock.  She had appologised.  After I yelled at her.  It was jarring.
+
+``We're over-worked right now,'' she admitted.  ``And that's not an excuse, I know, I just mean, I'm falling apart with so much work.  Important things keep slipping through the cracks.  Things like all of this.  Things that keep hurting you.''
+
+``Its still a shallow apology,'' I deadpanned.  ``At least, until something changes.''
+
+Ai started to respond, but I cut her off by picking a direction and walking.  Was it childish?  Absolutely, but I didn't really care.
+
+I had a lot to think about.
+
+Like, what crazy goddess just casually decides to force femme someone?  Who does that?  Divinity or not it wasn't fair to me.
+
+I didn't get a choice.  I was just a demon girl now.
+
+It happened to me, like one of the massive hurricanes that blast the archologies every few months.  Not that they weren't protected, they were built to withstand the hurricanes.  The problem is, I wasn't built for this type of storm at all.
+
+What was my problem anyway?  I thought I had accepted this earlier, but it was like the new information had pulled the mental bandage off in a violent fit.  It hurt more than before.
+
+Back to square one.  Or maybe two squares behind that, even.
+
+I didn't want \emph{any} of this.  Not to deal with it.  And certainly not to think about it.
+
+I just wanted to program computers and maybe hack some banks on the side.  Why would anyone, let alone a goddess, think I would even want magic?
+
+Or a department of mages under me?  Or a \emph{new body}.
+
+I was getting a new body literally right now.  A body I had no choice in.  A body I couldn't really even feel.
+
+It should have been a relief.  All of it.  I now had stable employment being paid, presumably, an astronomical salary.  I get a new body that will fit in to the work environment, more or less.  I get magic, an entirely new system to be explored.  And there were beautiful women literally everywhere.
+
+This should have been the opportunity of a lifetime.  It should have been heaven.
+
+But I wasn't asked if I wanted it.  I didn't get to choose this.
+
+``Hey, look ou--''
+
+I smacked face first into a wall of stone, a collision ending with me laying on my back in the soft blue sand.
+
+``Well,'' I mumbled, not bothering to get back up.  ``I guess I deserved that.''
+
+``Hey are you okay?  I tried to get your attention before you crashed, but I wasn't fast enough.''  A hand entered my vision, offering to help me up.
+
+``I uh,'' I began.  \emph{I what?  I'm good down here?  Nice try.}  I grabbed hold and used the assistance to right myself.  ``Thanks.''
+
+``Lost in thought there,'' she laughed.  ``I'm Liina, you're the new officier in charge of my division.''
+
+``Not my choice,'' I muttered.
+
+``Well, officer not your choice,'' Liina said in a haughty tone.  ``Your choice or not, you've got lots of people depending on you to be a good leader.''
+
+``What a nice pep talk.''  I returned the tone.  She made me feel even worse.  It was a manipulation tactic and I knew it.
+
+``That's not what I meant,'' she said, shaking her head.  Her tone was decidedly softer.  ``We all depend on you, yes, but you can depend on us.  All of your training is assuredly going to be on the job training.  Most of us don't have any experience when we start out, so we all help each other.  Your fellow officers will help you with stuff we can't, and we will help you with everything else.''
+
+``And in exchange you get, what, favour with an officer?''
+
+``No,'' she laughed.  A real hearty laugh that lasted far too long.  ``We all serve the Goddess here.  She knows best.''
+
+Horror flashed across my face.  I knew this was a magically enhanced organization with an actual Goddess in charge.  I didn't know it was a cult with an extremely rigid heirarchy in place.  It was even enforced by \emph{literal} divine right.
+
+``I'm, uh,'' I ran.  Well, more accurately, I disconnected.
+
+There weren't any places for me to go.  I didn't have any private instances or worlds, or whatever the virtual environments were called.  So I just returned to my own body.  The one that was the cause of so much anguish already.  It wasn't even done changing.
+
+But then I felt it.  A smooth calm settled over me, cut by the fluid flowing through my veins and in the tank around me.
+
+I could feel the connection between mind and body.  A connection I'd never felt before.  It was like waking up and having a cup of coffee, the clarity shattering those fuzzy moments before.  Except this feeling was everywhere at once.  I could twitch my fingers and feel how real they were.
+
+This feeling was euphoria, and I'd never felt it before in my life.  Not like this.
+
+I moved my body as much as I could.  The range of motion available through the freezing cold fluid wasn't much.  But it was enough.
+
+Opening my eyes wasn't advised, I knew that, but I did it anyway.
+
+I was upright, mostly, and the blue tint of the fluid I was suspended in made it hard to see colours through the glass pannel.  The world beyond was similar to what I remember going in: a small, somewhat dingy makeshift hospital.  The wall I could see was lined with cotts.  Nobody was in any of them.
+
+I couldn't see any oxygen tubes or anything like that, so I figured I was breathing the liquid.  Perhaps it was oxygen-rich enough, or maybe my biology was completely different now.  Maybe Lucere had said something about it before.  I couldn't really remember.
+
+At least, based on the amount of light streaming through the window, I guessed it was daytime.  I had no clue what day, of course.  I reached out to try and grasp at the light, but something else caught my attention.
+
+I could see the colour of my skin: ashen with splotches, like black ink was dripped on thin paper and dried over a flame.  My fingers ended in claw-like protrusions and my palms were a light icy blue.
+
+It should have panicked me, that my body had changed so much.  I wasn't given a choice.  I should have been feeling absolutely terrified.  Maybe even disgusted.
+
+I felt releived more than anything.
+
+I pushed against the glass, trying to feel any differences in my sense of touch.  Instead, I got a first hand lesson in Newton's Third Law.  I had pushed myself backwards and felt something I couldn't quite process.  The cold metal of the tank, yes that was fine.  But the feeling was coming from somewhere I couldn't comprehend.  Something alien, but also seemingly mine.
+
+Panic.  Sheer, raw, panic.
+
+I began thrashing, unable to stop myself.  My breathing was suddenly hampered by the fluid as my brain was unable to get enough oxygen.  Everything was wrong.
+
+And then the fluid started to drain, its blue tint suddenly gone.  The weight of my body was immense compared to the neutral boyancy the fluid provided.  Yet even that paled in comparison to my biggest issue: I couldn't breathe.
+
+My lungs were full of liquid, now unable to get new oxygen.
+
+The tube I was in must have openned because I was suddenly on the floor coughing up cold liquid and fighting for a single breath of air.  Seconds felt like hours when I finally got that first breath of air in my suddenly brand new lungs.  The tile floor, and everything, felt incredibly hot to the touch.  The air was like fire in my lungs.
+
+It was all new levels of discomfort.
+
+``Hey, didn't I tell you not to move around too much when I put you in there?''  Her voice sounded familiar, I knew it was Lucere, but it also sounded completely different.
+
+I tried to speak, but no words came out.  I frowned.
+
+``Vocal paralysis,'' Lucere informed me.  ``From the cryogenic fluid.  You'll need a few minutes before you can speak.  Lucky you your fever has been in and out, you don't need to be in that stuff right now.  If you had still needed it you'd have broken the cryo chamber with those new muscles of yours.''
+
+``Wh.. at.. day?'' I managed to ask just above a whisper between intense panting and frequent spluttering.
+
+``Its been about a week and a half since we picked you up,'' she answered, then pointed at another cryochamber that was back to back with the one I just emerged from.  ``Her, too.  She should have been done by now, but we can't get her fever to break even temporarily.  Don't worry though, yours is about to kick back into overdrive.  Hers is almost done, probably.  You want some food?''
+
+I nodded.  Of course I wanted some food, it had been a week and a half since I'd consciously eaten anything.
+
+Nodding revealed a new set of problems, though.  Two of them to be specific.  I'd accidentally scuffed the floor with my horns.  The accident left my head with a ringing.  A piercing noise that lit my body with new white hot slashes of pain.
+
+
+
diff --git a/src/promise.tex b/src/promise.tex
index 5667629..0deb5d1 100644
--- a/src/promise.tex
+++ b/src/promise.tex
@@ -64,5 +64,9 @@
 \section{Eilidh}
 \input{src/chapters/04-b-monsterseverywhere.tex}
 
+\chapter{Downtime}
+\section{Vivian}
+\input{src/chapters/05-a-downtime.tex}
+
 \end{document}